Okay, time for a ramble.

People are entitled to their own likes, their own dislikes.

If you don’t like snark, then I’d steer clear of snarky blogs.  Likewise, if you don’t like always reading sites that are upbeat and cheerful, then don’t go to sites that tend be pretty upbeat and cheerful.

If you don’t like honest opinions, and that may include some stuff that’s less than polite, then don’t hang out around people who are big on delivered their unvarnished opinions.  If you’re more for the unvarnished opinion, then don’t hang at a site where they tend use a spoonful of sugar.

Some of us want honesty, all the time, even if that honesty includes some negative stuff.

Some of us prefer not to hear negative stuff.

Either way is fine.  Believe it or not, it’s fine.

Those are our own likes and dislikes.  We’re entitled to them.  You can’t take away a person’s right to prefer snark over sunshine, and you can’t take away a person’s right to prefer sunshine over snark.  Trying to doesn’t do anything but piss people off and give you a headache.  And the sunshine vs snark thing really doesn’t make an impact on the industry…or well, it does, but it’s not a negative impact, because there are plenty of readers who are looking for both of them.  Some want the snark.  Some want the sunshine.  And both really do help the industry, because both get the word around.  Both will draw readers together.  That’s a good thing.

Now I don’t know how much of the disconnect between the sunshine vs snark has to do with reviews, how much has to do with the general ‘feel’ of a blog…is it the sunshine or the snark variety?  I don’t know.  And honestly, I don’t care.  Because it doesn’t impact me unless I let it.

Really…it doesn’t impact me.  The blogs that center on snark, and have really harsh reviews…they don’t impact me.  It doesn’t take anything away from me if somebody rips one of my books to shreds.  It really doesn’t.  It might sting a little bit, but it’s passing and I’ll get over it.  Now if somebody goes into some personal attack on me solely because they didn’t like a book, that’s a little different-you can’t make many personal insights into a person based on what they write.  Or at least, you can’t make valid personal insights.

If there’s a blog that’s big into dissecting the industry and talking about what they think is wrong, how to make it better, it doesn’t affect me.

Likewise, if somebody prefers not to hear the negative stuff and everything is about the sunshine…guess what, that doesn’t take anything away from me, either.  If there’s a blog that’s really big on waxing positive on the industry, authors, etc, it doesn’t affect me.

Sometimes, I want the snark.  Sometimes, I want the sunshine.

Sometimes, I’m not in the mood to hear the positive and sometimes, I’m not in the mood for the negative.  There are just days when I don’t want it, and on those days, if I find myself at a blog, or in a real life discussion that includes negativity, I can either click away, or in real life, try to turn things around–or leave. I’m not required to linger in a place where I’m forced to hear negativity.  It’s not like I’m in a customer service industry-standing around listening to negativity isn’t required of me.

When it comes to blogland, it’s not required of anybody.

We can decide if we want to hang out at a blog known for snark.  Liking it just means that…you like that blog.

We can decide if we want to hang out at a blog known for the non-snark.  Liking it just means that…you like that blog.

We can decide if we want to hang out at a blog known for honesty and snarky reviews. Liking it just means that…you like that sort of review.

We can decide if we want to hang out at a blog known for reviews that tend to veer away from the negative.  Liking it just means that…you like that sort of review.

Enjoying a snarky blog doesn’t make anybody a bad person.  Writing a snarky blog doesn’t make anybody a bad person.  Not enjoying a snarky blog doesn’t make you a bad person.  Not writing a snarky blog doesn’t make you a bad person.

Nobody is required to best buddies with anybody else.

Hell, we’re not even required to respect other people, but if we did…well, respecting another’s viewpoints can go a very long way.  Even if you don’t understand those viewpoints.  Even if they confound the hell out of you.

There are plenty of people out there that I either don’t like, that I don’t respect, maybe they confound the hell out of me…or all of the above. Some of the people are so fricking out there, so toxic, I think they ought to be considered a public safety hazard.  But…that’s my opinion.   Their attitudes, their viewpoints, their opinions, make no impact on me, on my job, on my writing, on my view of the industry, unless I choose to let it.

These people who irritate/confound/annoy me, I don’t think they ought to be shut down, shut out, confined to some deserted island where they can’t cause problems.  I don’t want that, because I can guarantee you that for every person that I dislike, disrespect, don’t understand, there’s somebody out there thinking the same thing about me, and as much as some people may love it, I don’t want to be shut down, shut out or sent away to some desert island just because not everybody likes me.

The people I don’t like, I deal with them by not dealing with them. I don’t interact with them.  I don’t visit their blogs, I don’t talk to them, I don’t email them…I have no contact with them.  It’s just that easy.  The rare occasion when I have to interact, I keep it as polite and professional as possible-that’s the quickest and easiest way to do it.

People can’t ask for respect without giving it.  They can’t expect tolerance and understanding and kindness, unless they give it.  It’s just that easy.

Sigh… end of ramble.